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Dungeons & Dragons

Do not expose your opponent to bright lights or sunlight which will kill, do not get them wet, and never feed them after midnight.

These are some of the ludicrous things you may come across when playing a game of Dungeons & Dragons, along your journey you may encounter some boring parts, you can skip these bits if you so wish.


Dice rolls determine much of what happens, these scores make up the basis of the game play, this is the boring bit you can skip this, however it all sounds quiet readable, they include:

Ability scores, the most basic statistics of a character.

Armour class, how well-protected a character is against attack.

Hit points, how much punishment a character can take.

Saving throws, a character's defenses against nonphysical or area attacks.

Attack rolls and damage rolls, how effectively a character can score hits against, and inflict damage on, another character.

Skills, how competent a character is in various areas of expertise.

Feats, what special advantages a character has through natural aptitude or training.


Now things start to seem very boring and more silly from now on, you can skip this bit and yet it's still readable.

Strength: Strength is a measure of muscle, endurance and stamina combined.

Dexterity: Attributes including hand-eye coordination, agility, reflexes, fine motor skills, balance and speed of movement.

Constitution: This encompasses the character's physique, toughness, health and resistance to disease and poison.

Intelligence: Intelligence is similar to IQ.

Wisdom: A composite term for the character's enlightenment, judgment, wile, willpower and intuitiveness.

Charisma: The measure of the character's combined physical attractiveness, persuasiveness, and personal magnetism.

Comeliness: This is to differentiate between physical attractiveness and charisma.

Sanity: Used for actions like understanding the writings of raving lunatics and for dedicatedly dealing with resisting the equally optional madness damage type.

Honour: It determines both how well the character adheres to the respective society's code and how well he understands its tenets.


Keeping up stamina, is no mean feet, I have no idea what type of foods you would need to eat, however I do know throwing a double 6 in any game of Dungeons & Dragons will score you quite favourably, something that won't work in real life much! I first came upon this bewildering game while enrolled in college back in 1985, I was only a spectator as they insisted I wasn't 'good enough' to play in their little group. Not sure what they meant by the term not 'good enough', I used a 'good enough' amount gel in my hair back then and since when is throwing a dice an exact science? I don't want to blow my own trumpet here but I was 'good enough' at Monopoly and my dice throwing skill were very favourable indeed. Spectating Dungeons & Dragons wasn't much fun and all that bewilderment soon turned out to be nothing more than a change in my dedication. 


My thoughts soon turned to more pressing matters, why had I written all my course work in red pen, why had the college lecturers left it until the very end of my course to mention the use of the red pen probably wasn't a very good idea!



References:

Real life observations with some fiction

Check the links below to buy any numerous books on your chosen subject

WHSmith

Waterstones


An Air of Science Fiction Buffoonery 

I never did pay much attention in lessons at school, teachers would throw chalk at me when ever I was looking distracted, maybe it was the medication I was on, or maybe I was distracted, or was it that ever so slightly floaty feeling you get when you get up too fast, but when your sat in a chair can give the impression of looking distracted. English Literature wasn't any different to that floaty feeling, reading was not really my thing back then, it still ins't. I class reading like watching a film, you wouldn't turn off the film half way through, only to continue the next day. So I approach books in the same ridiculous manner, if I can't start and finish it in just over an hour I don't bother starting, I do have books I just haven't started any. 

English Literature would begin on Monday of every week with a visit to the school library, I would always find myself drawn to the Science Fiction section, and found myself grabbing something I picked the week before, The Best of Arthur C Clarke 1937-1955. The teacher never spotted that for a complete year I kept reading the same book over and over, week after week, that is until the day came I had to stand up in front of the class and read a chapter. I hardly needed to look at the pages as all the words were floating around my head like leaves on the wind, all I needed to do was put them back together into some coherent audible form. I was like some playwright of ancient times I grasped the perfect tone, mastered every pause and set each and every scene with an air of unawareness, by the time I reached the end of the chapter I looked up and saw everyone in the room with their eyes transfixed on me. There was a single eerily moment of silence which was very quickly drowned out by the sound of clappering and joyful cheer, even the teacher was joining in.


A moment in my life I would like never to happen again, that is unless someone was to have just read out my obituary!


References:

Real life observations with some fiction

Check the links below to buy any numerous books on your chosen subject

WHSmith

Waterstones

Sex and Sexuality! 

Never been much for caring let alone sharing, so when it comes to opening up and shouting about my sexuality the same applies.

I still don't get the idea or the big point of the 'coming out thing', does anyone really care about your sexuality, it's a personal thing, one that you alone feel and I certainly don't care who's face you prefer to sit on, or what hole you prefer to shag. I treat everyone the same regardless, and when it comes to my own sexuality I keep mine in my pants, to myself and my partner, no one else needs to know! What goes on behind closed doors remains there, well unless your into pornography and upload that kinda stuff, it's probably already gone viral, the word is out!


So whether your Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Heterosexual, or like me on the fence with that air of amused unawareness!

Yet you still feel the need to shout from the rooftops about it, that's fine, please don't mention my name!


References:

Personal observations only

Check the links below to buy any numerous books on your chosen subject

WHSmith

Waterstones

What is Porn?

Now that I have you attention, I would like to share some observations about porn and marketing campaigns, first the word porn.

So what is porn? noun [mass noun]

pornography: hardcore porn.

television programmes, magazine, books, etc. that are regarded as emphasising the sensuous or sensational aspects of a non-sexual subject and stimulating a compulsive interest in their audience: like much of the country, I drool over gastro-porn on telly.

adjective pornographic: a porn film.

ORIGIN: 1950s: abbreviation.

So what is pornography? noun [mass noun]

printed or visual material containing the explicit description or display of sexual organs or activity, intended to stimulate sexual excitement.

ORIGIN: mid 19th century: from Greek pornographos writing about prostitutes, from porn“ prostitute + graphein write.

 

Okay porn excites most people, and thankfully I no longer have interests in pornography, so what does that say about me a person? Not much, and who cares anyway, pornography is just bad no matter how you try to deflower it, or cover the nipples with tape, or burr the distance, or try to mask the nudity with sepia tones. There is still that element of uneasiness about any image that depicts a naked form. What about images of an erotic or sensual nature do these come under a different category, or are these images also to be classed as porn? Dare I mention Art and Glamour for fear of reprisal from an alternate social community group, can I write Porn, Art and Glamour in the same sentence and get away with it? I just did!

I would like to think most people would agree as long as you are of legal age and consenting, feel free to express yourself in what ever way you feel comfortable. Be aware if it gets in to the public domain it could go viral, one more thing, keep my name out of it!

Now marketing campaigns, I do get rather perturbed with all the excessive unnecessary nakedness on the box these days, even adverts show far too flesh, we all know how to shave, shower and shit. It's almost like the advertising marketeers think we need to see the product in action to believe in it! We know how a toothbrush works so why show it going in and out of some womans' big ugly mouth, blatantly pornographic!

 

I am glad there are a few marketing campaigns trying alternative means in attracting new customers......nagging doubt!
...when stuff sucks, make it right!
Then you have the adverts that just blow you away...

..it's not ketchup!...it's a vampire thing, you have to invite me in!

 

There is a little glimmer of something shinning through and if I keep the curtains closed I might make it till night time.

 

References:

Visual observations only

Check the links below to buy any numerous books on your chosen subject

WHSmith

Waterstones

Can you name these adorable characters?

Free to enter and you can enter more than once! 

The first ten people to get the right answers (spelt correctly) will each win free VIP Membership access to our dating website for a year!

Terms and conditions apply

 

How to enter:

1. Join our site, login and goto the forum

2. Look for the competition #007 post under chit chit

3. Reply to the post with your answer

4. There are ten VIP membership's to be won and are valid for one year

5. After such time the VIP membership will automatically revert back to our free membership option

6. You are under no obligation to continue the VIP membership and will not be billed

7. The site admins decision is final and no correspondence will be entered into

8. Closing date for the competition will be after an undisclosed number of entries have been made

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10. You must be eighteen (18) or over to join and enter this competition

 

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How many tissues are in the box? 

 

Free to enter and you can enter more than once! 

There is obviously only one correct answer!

So the first ten people closest will each win free VIP Membership access to our dating website for a year!

Terms and conditions apply

 

How to enter:

1. Join our site, login and goto the forum

2. Look for the competition #006 post under chit chit

3. Reply to the post with your answer

4. There are ten VIP membership's to be won and are valid for one year

5. After such time the VIP membership will automatically revert back to our free membership option

6. You are under no obligation to continue the VIP membership and will not be billed

7. The site admins decision is final and no correspondence will be entered into

8. Closing date for the competition will be after an undisclosed number of entries have been made

9. Completely Free to enter

10. You must be eighteen (18) or over to join and enter this competition

 

#competition #dating #fun #free #giveaway

IQ Test - How many tomatoes are in this picture? 

 

Free to enter and you can enter more than once! 

The first ten people to get the right answer will each win free VIP Membership access to our dating website for a year!

Terms and conditions apply

 

How to enter:

1. Join our site, login and goto the forum

2. Look for the competition #005 post under chit chit

3. Reply to the post with your answer

4. There are ten VIP membership's to be won and are valid for one year

5. After such time the VIP membership will automatically revert back to our free membership option

6. You are under no obligation to continue the VIP membership and will not be billed

7. The site admins decision is final and no correspondence will be entered into

8. Closing date for the competition will be after an undisclosed number of entries have been made

9. Completely Free to enter

10. You must be eighteen (18) or over to join and enter this competition

 

#competition #dating #fun #free #giveaway

Can you identify these symbols? 

Free to enter and you can enter more than once! 

The first ten people to get the right answer will each win free VIP Membership access to our dating website for a year!

Terms and conditions apply

 

How to enter:

1. Join our site, login and goto the forum

2. Look for the competition #004 post under chit chit

3. Reply to the post with your answer

4. There are ten VIP membership's to be won and are valid for one year

5. After such time the VIP membership will automatically revert back to our free membership option

6. You are under no obligation to continue the VIP membership and will not be billed

7. The site admins decision is final and no correspondence will be entered into

8. Closing date for the competition will be after an undisclosed number of entries have been made

9. Completely Free to enter

10. You must be eighteen (18) or over to join and enter this competition

 

#competition #dating #fun #free #giveaway

The Darker Side of Astrology
Many articles are written about zodiac signs and there positive qualities, it's about time we showed you the darker side of every zodiac sign.

This dribbling is a parody with some fictitious over seasoning! To even things out a little we have included some Endearing and Annoying qualities.

Aries (March 21st-April 19th): impulsive, rabid brutes
They charge headlong into whatever they want without looking, and they sure as hell do it without concern for the consequences of their actions.
Selfish, immature, unconscious and rabid in their pursuit of what they want. Actually, it sounds kinda of sexy? Well, it is until you see them eat a hamburger.
Endearing: One of the most lovable things about Aries is that they approach everything in life with a child-like wonder and enthusiasm.
Annoying: Aries get so freaking fired up about everything, they often turn minor conflicts into major brawls.

Taurus (April 20th-May 20th): hoarders
They are slow, stubborn, lazy materialists with big heads and big feet.
Greedy as hell, and are quite happy sitting alone counting their money surrounded by all their useless toys like a grubby-handed toddler.
Intellectual, abstract, spiritual matters are beyond them since they only care about what they can get their hands on, but that won't stop them from preaching to everyone about how to live. They are basically know-it-all idiots.
Endearing: Sweet Taurus will shower the people they love with random acts of love and generosity.
Annoying: At the first sign of sickness, Taurus will clear the calendar, turn off the phone, call into work, and basically act like the world is ending.

Gemini (May 21st-June 20th): shallow windbags
Can seem like they have a lot to add to a conversation until you realise they have, at best, a superficial knowledge about everything they talk about.
Full of nothing but hot air and useless opinions, jumping from one subject to another, repeating information they've heard before to appear interesting. In reality very mediocre, shallow people with no real unique perspective or depth.
Endearing: A Gemini will always verbally express their feelings about everything. If they love you, you will hear about it constantly and feel like you have a #1 fan.
Annoying: Gemini has a tendency to act as if they know so much about what you’re talking about, even if they don’t.

Cancer (June 21st-July 22nd): little whiners
With their Hyper-sensitivity it makes it virtually impossible for anyone to tell them how they feel because they are afraid of hurting their insanely delicate feelings.
They are the biggest cry babies in the entire zodiac, and they are in serious need of some toughening up. But, that'll never happen because they are usually too busy crying about what victims they are.
If any Cancerian is still reading this through the tears welling up in their eyes, then I'd also like to add you tell way too many stories about your friends to people who don't know them. Perfect strangers do not care what you did when you were growing up in whatever of wherever. Live in the moment.
Endearing: Constantly wants to be with their loved ones. Like a loyal puppy, they will follow you around the house begging for quality time and snuggles.
Annoying: You’d be lucky to have a minute go by without insecurity issues popping up; they require constant reassurance.

Leo (July 23rd-August 22nd): pompous blowhards
They are probably too busy patting themselves on the back to read an article that isn't exclusively about them because they are so self-centred.
They don't even see the irony of how insecure they are underneath their constant need for praise.
When they can't get compliments from others, they start psychotically praising themselves like some kind of manic, Hollywood star from the '30s, yelling "Do you know who I am?!"
They are bossy tyrants, who love surrounding themselves with a bunch of people who offer them empty, shallow compliments.
Endearing: Every Leo has a bouncy, bubbly, positive energy that can’t be stifled and is super contagious.
Annoying: Leos are the biggest whiners. If things don’t go their way, if they don’t feel appreciated, hell, even if they are just a little tired you won’t hear the end of it.

Virgo (August 23rd-September 22nd): neurotic doormats
They are uptight people who control every detail of their lives to death because they hate spontaneity or any upset to their petty day-to-day routine.
Because of their neurotic inability to just let go and have fun, they make fantastic assistants or employees and horrific sexual partners.
Furthermore, their obsession with cleanliness is genuinely frightening to watch, as anything being out-of-place makes them fear for their lives.
Endearing: If you are close to Virgo, you know one of their cutest qualities is how they are always gathering different opinions and insights.
Annoying: Virgo’s incessantly worry about everything, making simple things seem overly complicated.

Libra (September 23rd-October 22nd): hypocritical people pleasers
Because of Libra's desire to be accepted and liked and their deep need to feel popular, they have no backbone and they rarely are able to just make a decision.
Going out to eat with them is impossible because they'll look at the menu like they are taking in a Great American Novel, never making up their minds and trying to do field research on the waiter with all their questions. Eventually, they'll just pick whatever you do because doing anything alone is impossible for them.
Phobic about exercising one shred of independence.
Endearing: Libra values other people so much that they will always go to great lengths to make any situation feel comfortable, calm, and enjoyable.
Annoying: Libras will tell you exactly what you want to hear, and aren’t above using their people skills to get what they want.

Scorpio (October 23rd-November 21st): petty perverts
Well known for being a sexual sign, however, their sexuality has less to do with sensual pleasure than a total lack of any ability to control their impulses.
They enjoy watching people suffer, as it makes the Scorpio feel more like they are in a position of power when others show signs of weakness.
They hide behind a mask of mystery and secrecy, trying to hide the obvious fact that they feel unloved, which drives them almost paranoid and leads them to treating their relationships like a series of political power plays. This eventually creates huge messes they never actually clean up.
Endearing: If someone they love has been wronged, Scorpio will do everything in their power to make it right — and we mean everything.
Annoying: They get so intense and serious about every little thing, making small decisions seem like life or death.

Sagittarius (November 22nd-December 21st): irritating attention-seekers
Don't be fooled by Sagittarians love for philosophy and spirituality or all their talk about it.
In truth, they are using these things to avoid the reality of everyday activities that they'd rather not deal with, and they are very empty people.
The most frustrating thing about them is, they'll never truly understand how their lack of thorough investigation into anything makes them look extremely dumb because they don't care.
It isn't knowledge they are after; it's the appearance of it.
Endearing: Sagittarius has an innately optimistic outlook that allows them to view the world from a place of hope and optimism.
Annoying: They are such perfectionists and more than a bit controlling — if you don’t do things their way, you are doing things wrong.

Capricorn (December 22nd-January 19th): social-climbing sharks
Capricorns are as duller than dull, cold as corpses, unfeeling and uncaring. That is, unless you have money or are a pathway to it.
The original social climbers, and nobody can blame them because their own personalities aren't interesting enough to climb the ladder of success on their own.
It's rare to find them having fun because that would be out of character for a sign that's so busy calculating whom they should be rubbing elbows with to get to the top and whom they should crush along the way.
Endearing: Capricorns have a warm and nurturing way about them. When you are around them you will always feel supported and well taken care of.
Annoying: If there’s not a specific plan in place, Capricorn cannot handle it and it’s only a matter of time before they freak out.

Aquarius (January 20th-February 18th): sheep in wolves' clothing
While they might appear to be eccentric, weird or original, they are markedly aware of the fact that they are not that special.
It's simply their need to prove they are different that makes them so, not any inherent or real uniqueness.
They claim to be generous and altruistic, caring for all of humanity, but just ask their partners and they'll tell you that when it comes to one on one relationships, there is no one as detached or uncaring as an Aquarian.
They use their terminal uniqueness as an excuse for their lack of love and affection in their personal relationships, but in the end, believing they are geniuses could lead them to having a breakdown. Annoyingly, this would please them because they'll do anything to appear interesting.
Endearing: An Aquarius is always ready and willing to jump in and lend a helping hand no matter what else is going on in their own lives.
Annoying: Aquarians believe they always have the most logical perspective, AKA they don’t know when to shut up and listen instead of offering advice.

Pisces (February 19th-March 20th): sentimental nobodies
They are so willing to just go with the flow, that they spend most of their lives having only a vague sense of self.
Not really knowing who they are or what they want, they get caught up in sentimental hysteria and live in a constantly confused sort of chaos.
It's been said that not all who wander are lost, and if you are a Pisces, you probably love this quote. It gives you some affirmation that you're not completely lacking direction in your life, but you are, Pisces. You are lost.
Endearing: Pisces is naturally a subtle, open, and vulnerable person, which is something our society often frowns upon but they can’t help it and it’s lovely!
Annoying: They often seem to be stuck in slow motion, so it takes them literally three times as long as anyone else to get something done.


References:

Check the links below to buy any numerous books on astrology or your chosen subject

WHSmith

Waterstones

The Slow, Painful Way to Shed Pounds - How to Diet! 

No plagiarism, slightly fictitious with some misguided seasoning! 

 

When ever I talk openly about trying loose a little weight, the majority of people always insist on telling me sex is the best way to shedding them pounds! That always puts a smile on my face as those people telling this are mainly the very women that are trying to get me in to bed!

 

Well I tried the sex idea for about 4 months, it was sorta working, then I got dumped, so the sex stopped! Right, okay new strategy needed. I was drinking myself silly with wine during the week and then hitting the whiskey or rum at the weekends, don't get me wrong the breakup didn't turn me to the devils drink, this is where the story actually begins. Earlier this year I was trying for months to shift a little belly fat to get back into jeans I bought over 5 years ago, amazing enough with all the alcohol passing my lips I only gained an extra 3 inches. Still it was a shock looking at the scales and seeing the figure going up and up. I was almost hitting 14stone when I realised I needed to do something other wise I would back in the shops buying more jeans, I already had enough jeans.

 

So this is where the real diet story starts and the sex stops!

Cutting down on the alcohol was the major deal breaker in loosing the weight, I was already eating smaller meals that consisted of high protein foods with some salad, low carbs and drinking plenty of coffee to increase my metabolism. Sleep also plays an important part of any weight loss diet, getting enough is the make or break of busting the fat. So all I needed to do now was keep at it and start some exercise.

 

This is where the pain continues, I dislike sport and anything that involves breaking a sweat (unless its sex orientated)

Starting a new exercise routine especially if like me you have never done any in your life, is going to be like a breakup, painful.

So I decided to start small and work up to something more serious and intense later. I drew up a vigorous 2 minute work out schedule, a very simple routine involving pushups, sit-ups and a few planks. The exercise only takes up 2 minutes in the morning and 2 minutes in the evening, short vigorous workouts such as this should give the same cardio exercise as if doing an hour at a slower pace.

 

3 weeks in and I am seeing visible results, I am already back into the old jeans.

Still working towards 11.5stone which is apparently my healthy ideal BMI weight.

Looking awesome and feeling empowered!

References:

Visual observations only

Check the links below to buy any numerous books on your chosen subject

WHSmith

Waterstones

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WHSmith