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Hangups! from terrywebbs's blog

Bitdefender

 

Hangups! noun informal  

 

An emotional problem or inhibition: people with hang-ups about their age.  

 

1. Dating - the hangup about failing. 

I tirelessly search the hidden depths of the internet for answers, never far from being amazed at the crap that page 10 always brings. Hangups, is just another example of a lame internet search gone wrong. The resulting book called 'Hangups and Hangovers' was revealed to me with a short witty anecdotal passage, it tells the story of a writer in his 20's failing miserably at dating, and now sharing his misfortune in a sort of biographical snippet of his dating journey with humour and advice along the way. Okay I was a little intrigued, it sorta fit into the post genre I wanted to write about and I am recovering from a hangover so that was apt. I followed the links and found myself knee deep in poop. This chap had now gone from failing dating to failing bodybuilder, no idea how you link the two together, I can only imagine in his quest to discover why he was failing at dating he sort of stumbled into an eating disorder and then started weightlifting, I don't want to speculate too much, but I will, that's a few hangups right there. It wasn't until I got to the part about ripping and tearing (bodybuilders will know what this term means) when I decided enough was enough, this isn't the story I envisaged. Don't just take my word for it, the book is probably a real good read, but building muscle to attractive women is not my thing! To all those Johnny Bravo lookalikes out there; good look in your quest in finding that perfect body to match yours. Another hangup right there!

 

2. Fire - the hangup about burning stuff.

Even what might seem the most perfect of life styles can have its challenges. Sudden obstacles or setbacks can rattle your self-confidence and make you self critical and insecure about even simple everyday decisions. There is a lot of research out there that makes claim that all our hangups point back to a time in our childhood, that's every little thing you ever worry about or have a fear of, can be traced back to a certain point when you were a child. The research is that accurate they can even draw up synopsis surrounding any childhood event and give advise on how to overcome future possible hangups. A childhood event doesn't necessarily need to be traumatic, but lets be sadistic here, they mainly do! I recall a time when my brother and I found some matches and we then systematically set fire to all the toys in the outside shed, even the big red toy car didn't get of see much day light after that. It was funny seeing mum and dad running back and forth with buckets of water, in those days hose pipes were far too expensive. Some other kids that day set fire to a bank, the woodland kind not money. I have never played with fire since, not so sure about my brother!

 

3. Fear - the hangup about the unknown.

Ever peered through the letter box or took a peak around the curtain to see who was at the front door, rather than just answering the bloody door?

No, well I do! I never put myself into situations that involve stuff I am unfamiliar with, or places I haven't been before, for the shear fear of the unknown might happen! I am always thinking about worst case scenarios way in advance of any meetings, journey, the big food shop (I am okay with the small food shop) telephone calls, the simple act of going out isn't without its issues. I run through all possible outcomes and once that has been achieved even then I get to the front door and stop, have a little think, did I miss anything? Even when I am out and the whole going out thing is almost over, something I failed to think always seems to happen, there's a queue at the till, there dragging out all those vouchers, I start to fret, I hadn't planned on being in the queue longer than 2:3mins. I feel faint, my heart is racing, I start to thinking I should have joined the other queue! 

 

4. Tidiness - the hangup about everything.

This is one of my all time bug bares, things being out of place. I am not obsessive or anything near manic like some people can be with picture frames. Nothing is arrange by date with all the labels to the front of the cupboard, this doesn't apply to the 20 packets of cuppa soup. Everything has it's place and is kept neat and tidy not to any type of angle or degree, but the remotes and coaters are all at right angles. I am not compulsive however anything that needs folding, is folded one way and placed in a draw, then socks get thrown in one side and underwear to the other. I don't iron anything, it all comes straight out of the washer and immediately onto hangers to dry. I don't push the vacuum about much as it's a stupid awkward thing that gives me a bad back, anyway I do enough exercise I don't need anymore. I do have a mass of paperwork on one side of the desk, once in a while I sort through it, then put it all back where it was for another year, only taking out anything I might need, I did notice a letter from the NHS dating back to 2015 with a post it note I had attached with the words 'IMPORTANT - notify the doctors of your new address, idiot you moved.' So much for being organised!

 

5. OCD - the hangup about hangups.

This is the ultimate icing on the cake, if you have ever watched anyone with a obsessive–compulsive disorder, you feel this almost compulsive desire to say something you know is going to be the worst thing to ever come out of your mouth, but you most inadvertently do say it. It normally takes on the form of 'you have already done that, already', or 'what are you doing', or 'is that some routine you always do'. None of these will go down well with anyone let alone a person with OCD. I do however get some small satisfaction out of watching the OCD afflicted acting in a most bizarre way with the tap or fridge, if only to that degree that I thank my parents for bringing my brother and I through our childhood without fucking it up too much.

 

Summary:

Take it as it comes and don't worry too much, shit happens, and when its happening more often to others its sadistically satisfying that they are worse off than you. You are perfectly you in every way, so stay that way!

Accepting the fact that nobody is perfect and that you will make mistakes, you then can strive to inspire others.

Work on accepting that not everyone will like you, no matter how nice you are or how much you try to please them. 

We all live from our own perception and in almost every situation, there is no right or wrong.

There are just differences in opinions and the way we all see the world.

Don’t let what others say or their opinions define who you are. You are a unique human being; which means you are powerful in your own right.

Trust that events are unfolding the way they are meant to and stop trying to control the situation. Embracing the unknown is when the greatest surprises will present themselves.

Let go of the past and move forward, you have the present moment and a choice to make it joyful, happy, and full of love.

References:

Personal observations some anecdotal 

Check the links below to buy something to help with your hangups

WHSmith

Waterstones


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